Leaning into my VULNERABILITY

In today’s culture where we are constantly exposed to the meticulously curated feeds of beautiful people in beautiful places living “perfect” lives, it can feel extremely scary and uncomfortable to allow ourselves to be vulnerable. To be raw and authentic is second nature to us with the conditioning that we have grown up with to be perfect at all times in order to be accepted. It is very easy to feel like you are never enough as your authentic self, but being vulnerable and authentic is what allows us to form meaningful connections! Human beings don’t connect with each other because we’re flawless—in fact it’s quite the opposite. To find people who really get you in all your raw realness, who make you say “oh my god i’m not the only one” is what makes this life so beautiful. We’re not cookie cutter products that come with a universal user manual. We were not formed in factories to all perform the same tasks, do the same things, look the same exact way. We are all divine beings each here for our soul’s own unique purpose.

My goal here is to be as vulnerable and transparent with you guys as possible in order to EMPOWER and CONNECT WITH you guys. It is not to trigger insecurities or intimidate you. The content that I have shared is meant to be a tool for you guys to overcome any fears you have about leading an active lifestyle—especially if you’re just getting started, because honey believe me I have been there. I remember how nervous I used to be going into the gym alone. I had absolutely no clue what I was doing. But here I am now, on the other side of it living every single day in a way that honors my body AND my mind. While I will continue to post plenty of #fitspo for you guys, I also want to share more about myself and my stories. Because who connects to someone solely based on how they look or how many burpees they can do? I want the rest of my content to really resonate with you on a soul level. I want to bring you more “AHA moments” (thank you Oprah). Allowing myself to be vulnerable has been a big fear for me for a long time.

After painful experiences in college I never wanted anyone to see the dark/not so pretty parts of my life out of fear that I would be judged. I became a shell of myself, no longer recognizing who I was. I felt like I was always putting on a show for everyone. Not only that, but shying away from really feeling. I created this “no fucks” facade, acting like I was unphased by anything, suppressing any and all emotions. Through lots of emotional hygiene practice (read Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman), I was able to heal after those experiences, and I am learning to address not just the light, but the dark as well. Because that which we avoid has power over us. If I continue to hide from my fears, they will forever haunt me. So… I am making it my mission to be my most authentic self, and sharing my creative expression with you guys along the way. I will no longer make myself small in the name of “normalcy”. And neither should you! Let’s all embrace our weird, nasty, wild selves. p.s. I love you!

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